Top Five Reasons Fall is the Best Season

Published October 16, 2007
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1. It is the perfect weather to stroll through the colorful foliage and have the crunchiness of the leaves drown out the suicidal thoughts echoing in your head after being dumped.

2. After all the leaves fall off all the conifers, you thank God that He made the trees near the Catholic Center on the way to Redstone pine trees to protect your righteous “ toking.”

3. School work takes a backseat to preparing for a spooky holiday that is so different from normal life—dress up in special clothes, get really messed up, and hook up with someone you don’t know.

4. The cold but not-too-cold autumnal wind somehow lessens the effects of the daily food poisoning experienced after eating at Harris-Millis.

5. It is finally the time to don a sweater and scarf and beret, head to Muddy Waters, and scribble down “stripped down” lines of “visceral” poetry like a Parisian expatriate while occasionally chatting on the cell-phone.

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